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  • Rachel Rutherford

'You're on Mute' & Other 2020 Stories

If I’m honest, I can’t actually remember the first couple of months of 2020. I do however remember I was feeling stuck in a rut. I was in a job I wasn’t enjoying, working in an office that was freezing cold (and I’m talking freezing) and living in a cycle of sleep, eat, work, train, repeat.

I first heard about Coronavirus in December 2019. Many of the suppliers I dealt with while at Alpkit were in China. I remember at the time we really didn’t understand the significance of the virus, ironically more nervous about how it would delay orders in 2020.

Moving into March and suddenly I am leaving work with my laptop just in case the government told us we had to work from home. From that day I was WFH and decided to go back to Southampton for the weekend to see my family. I guess it’s only natural to run home when you feel nervous.

A few days later Boris delivered the blow of the impending lockdown and I had to make the decision on where I was going to spend it. I spent the first few weeks at my dad’s house. During this time I got furloughed from Alpkit, painted one fence panel and cycled a lot! After a few weeks my step-mum found out she was on the ‘vunerable list’ and to limit her exposure I spent the remainder of lockdown at my mums.

If I'm completely honest, following Kona 2019, I felt burned out. I wasn't really enjoying my training it was almost like I was on autopilot. In some ways, the lockdown has caused a positive shift in direction for my life, forcing me to make changes that I was too tired to make previously.

There were a few positives I will pull out of this time:

1. I mended a family relationship

2. I got to spend lots of time outside in the sunshine walking, running & cycling

3. I got to spend a lot of time with my family

4. I got a dream job at the Coop

At the end of July I was kicked out of the house by my step dad, and luckily Ceri was happy to have me back in Nottingham. It was lovely to be home, and it was that week that I started my new job.

Starting a new job virtually is certainly a challenging experience. While it went well, which I have to credit to my manager & team, 5 months in I am really missing the social interaction of being in the office.

The new job is located in Manchester and I made the move in August. Truth be told I do question day to day whether it was the right

decision, as being up here on my own during lockdown has been hard. Meeting people has been really challenging and at times I feel really lonely. This coupled with being in and out of lockdown I have found really difficult.

In October, my Instagram account got disabled. I still don’t know why, but at 9000 followers this caused me significant distress. Through some fluke I got it back after about 6 weeks and in November I hit 10k. This community has been a massive support to me this year, and it's crazy to think that many people follow my journey.

Christmas was a bit dramatic (family) and I ended up heading back to Southampton and spending 2 evenings in the local Travelodge. This being said it was lovely to see my Mum & Dad and an even bigger bonus I stopped into Nottingham on the way home to see the sausage dog puppies. I don’t think I have ever seen something so cute!

We finish 2021 in another lockdown and just like the rest of 2020, I will look for the positives in every day. I can still get outside, and now go on a weekly walk in the Peak District, which is even more beautiful in the snow. I have also upgraded to a fancy Wahoo Kickr turbo trainer which means I don’t miss my David Lloyd membership quite as much..

I have written down 11 goals for 2021, I would really encourage you to do the same!!


1. Buy my own house

2. Compete for Team GB in triathlon

3. Continue learning & improving in my new job

4. Do my triathlon coaching qualification

5. Start some public speaking

6. Read at least one book a month, in paperback form

7. Start completing a daily mindfulness session & recording in a journal

8. Regularly upload to my Youtube channel

9. Stop sleeping with my phone in my room

10. Unpick a bad habit of mine (which I’m not going to name)

11. Improve my time & energy management

As always thanks for reading. Please drop me a follow on the gram and check out my Youtube Vids (They will 100% make you smile)

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